Sean Thomas MacInnes |
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love
as you like or happy as you like the winter
i felt a little i didn’t find nor did i find i continue i conduct i’m beginning to wonder i don’t recognize i don’t feel passionate i didn’t start out i don’t want to complain i’m living today i trust i follow i idly look up i can’t remember i haven’t i miss having i’m going i dropped the keys i think i feel calmer i can’t tell i never learned i was near tears i’m too smart i thought i was very sick i held hands i gave a prayer i saw lake waters i sensed slippery mud i’ll be reborn i’m pretty sure i probably i’m almost wishing i’d like to try i used to romanticize i’ve alienated when i look closely i can’t quite see i guess i was hungry i know nothing i passed on i missed the scene i wondered i feel 31yrs old i have no business in this place i wait for lunch i’m starting i tell you i’ve figured out i look forward i should say i don’t intend i’ll leave i never imagined i never knew i’m connecting i’m enjoying myself i was doing i’d never think i promised i could say i can see i’d care but i lose track i lose track i make i like i could go on i imagine i am too nice i forget i was more interested i feel occasional bouts i have no time i have done enough i could not resist i can only ask i’m listening i don’t expect much i don’t exactly believe i’m afraid i understand i’m massively selfish i haven’t moved i sat down i talked i tried i’ve noticed i’m this rogue i can be a very nice guy i let myself i’ve grown adept i can say i was touched i began to enjoy i fell into doubt so here i am i lied i hope to work thru this i have had a hard time i’ve learned not to feel i guess i love the mountains i do work i miss the blue skies i never lived i should just have sex i sat and thought i can’t accurately recreate i got stoned i guess i relate a little i remember i had been using it blindly i haven’t been reading much i’ve heard a little i guess there’s a chance what do i know i miss my dreamy life i stepped into it fully i wanted gritty i was up against some disabling life habits i droned on i got a package i’m laying to rest i feel good i have a great mojo i was struck i took the day off i became a little strange to myself i try not to be disappointed i can’t imagine i have to travel i want to believe i thought i was done i was naïve i know my dislikes i learned i could disappear i have left i’m in this place i was wrong i was in a lot of pain i’m going to stop i have lifted myself i don’t have the words i abound in diversionary tactics i was ashamed i had nothing i was in denial i’m on a chunk i never do i didn’t feel i could i’m claustrophobic i can fight i don’t want to admit it i’m tired of being this person i have followed i’m attempting to i don’t want to be trapped i’ve made a horrible mistake i know that i can listen i don’t need to respond i find it attractive i do wonder about beauty i’m fascinated i’m optimistic i have that feeling i could beat the shit out of someone i just got through paying the bills i didn’t say that right did i write it wrong i think my motivation’s all kaplooey i just can’t be bothered i could be bothered i’m just bored and a little confused who am i fooling i examine the history i could persist i assume i know exactly what’s going on there’s nothing i can do about it i investigate i experiment i eaves drop i witness my involvement when i was younger i ran i was ready i actually tried i’ve tangled that metaphor i’m modeling i put it in a blue vase i let it go i never told you i’ve said nothing i took my eye off the ball i refuse to explain myself i checked i don’t allow myself things i trust something is happening i split into two i must work harder i have yet to run out i sigh a lot i dream of nevada i don’t deny it i’d meant to look deeper i’ve skated i could initiate i hold a certain warmth i am part and parcel i am nervous am i grown up should i expand i feel guilty i wouldn’t even have time i’m sorry i didn’t tell you i can see my breath i’m in the thick of it i can feel it all right now i can’t put it in words i have woken the cat i looked down i saw smoke i did go dancing i’m scared i’m ashamed i can’t sleep what can i break i deserve it i tried to fall i exhaust pillows i took a ginger pill i drank water i was horny
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